The (Very) Slow Boat to Laos

We had three options of how to get to Luang Prabang in Laos – the slow boat down the Mekong river which takes 2 days, a speedboat that covers the same distance in 6 hours but is notoriously dangerous, or a 13 hour bus journey on a winding dirt road through the mountains. We chose the safe but slow river boat option – I’m really glad we did as its been one of the highlights of the trip. I wont pretend it was fun being on a boat for two days but sitting on the edge watching the mountains, water buffalo and fishing villages slip past was magical.

Our luxury yacht to Luang Prabang

So, after a night at the Thai border town we set off early to cross the Mekong and enter Laos. We’d been warned about an “official” that comes up to you once you’ve crossed the border and tells you horror stories of how awful the boat is, and then tries to sell you an upgrade for his expensive bus. Sure enough up he pops, we wont fall for your lies we think and politely decline to attend his “briefing”. As soon as we do this his charming act is gone and he tells us that we’re now on our own and no one will help us. We ignored him and carried on our way but half an hour later when we were getting our passports checked at the police station there seemed to be some problem with us getting our boat tickets but we couldn’t understand what they’re saying. Then this horrible little man appeared again and started pointing at us and ranting in Laos – it seems that not only was he not going to help us, he was actually going to try and stop us getting on the boat! Not a very good first impression of Laos. Luckily things improved after that, we got a good spot on the boat and sat back and relaxed. (Unfortunately some chavs decided to set up camp next to us and passed the time poring vodka into their eyes – no joke!). Much reading, card games and beer Laos later we reached civilization again and disembarked at Luang Prabang.

In true Spicy hostel style as soon as we arrived Pong, the guy that runs it, told us he’d arranged dinner at the village chiefs house for the annual ‘Celebration of the Snake’ festival. We were made to feel extremely welcome by the locals who prepared us an amazing dinner, and who were all a bit drunk after drinking solidly for two whole days. They tried to teach us how to dance Laos style which was a bit of a disaster but very amusing – later on we tried to teach them the macaranna but that didn't really work either. Before we went home the grandmother of the family performed a ritual where we were all blessed to give us good luck and happiness, which was amazing to be a part of.

The next morning we went off to the Kuang Si waterfalls which were stunning, 5 different tiers culminating in a 60m drop. We amused ourselves with diving and rope swings for half a day and then went to visit a fishing village where one of the hostel staff grew up on the way home.

Girl Power!

The children were really excited to see us at first and ran down to meet us, but they got a bit naughty after a while and started pulling the legs off live frogs and throwing them at us, eurgh. The boys also took part in some mud wrestling.

Mekong mud bath

On day three we got up at 5am to watch the monks on their alms round – this is when the monks walk through the town and all the locals line up on the street to offer them food. Its quite a sight to see hundreds of saffron coloured monks at that time in the morning, really peaceful. But it seemed to have become quite a tourist attraction with some people going right up to the monks and taking photos in their face as if they were animals which was a real shame to see.

Monk breakfast

Then the illness started, one by one we dropped like flies. 6 out of the 8 of us got it, and probably half the hostel overall. Very bad timing as under sickness in the Lonely Planet it tells you to leave Laos and head straight to Thailand! After a few days in bed we’d recovered though and went on our way south to Vang Vieng.